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I shouldn`t have to work. People should just pay me for being awesome.
I`m sick to death of these letters from the City of College Station bullying me to mow my grass! If Walmat can prepare for Christmas 3 mths in advance why can`t I do the same for Easter!!!??
I know you`re the instructor but I`ve seen Ghost 47 times so I know for a fact this IS how pottery is made!
when humans are in love they get butterflys...dose that mean when butterflys are in love they get humans!! :)
Do you think Santa regrets giving all those bad kids coal now that global warming is threatening his home?
Single ladies, stop saying you should just give up & get a cat , if no man wants you , don`t force an innocent cat to live with you..
I wonder when people without cars pick their noses…
If you tickle me, I’m not responsible for your injuries.
According to this BMI chart ... I am to short.
My boss told me that if I can`t show up sober then don`t bother coming to work tomorrow. Three day weekend!
Word for today: Dipshidiot
Millions of innocent coconuts are murdered each year so you can drink their nutritious blood you insensitive health freak
If someone threw a rock and knocked me off my donkey, would I be stoned off my a$$?
Guys just want a virgin porn star and girls just want a dangerous safe guy.
Please be patient...I`m fcuking things up as fast as I can.