Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Some people are like water balloons; they`re more fun when you throw them out the window.
In movies, do actors wear costume underwear? Or underwear from home? The whole thing is confusing. I don`t think I can keep watching movies
If I ran the country, things would be a lot better ... Well, for me anyway.
Screw getting an alarm system. I`ve seen Home Alone, I know what to do.
A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down, unless that medicine is insulin.
I really shouldn`t have driven home from the bar last night. Especially since I walked there.
If you guys could read my mind! It would be all like; " "
If something on this page offends you, please bring it to our attention so we can all laugh at you.
I think God created marriage so death wouldn`t come as such a disappointment.
My penis was in the Guinness book of World Records. Then the librarian told me I had to take it out before she called security.
Dr. Oz says having 1/2 hour of sex is equivalent to running 6 miles. I guess I`m going to the gym today.
Just read someones status, "Today is the frist day of your life," Thats just stupid, mine was over 45 years ago.. If it was the frist day of your life you wouldn`t be able to read it... Dummy
If I was just learning English and you told me a sport called BOXING takes place in a SQUARE area called a RING, I`d probably give up.
Have you ever loved someone so much, you wanted to keep them hidden from the world and all to yourself? Well, apparently its called kidnapping
No one texts faster than a gossiping woman.