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I`m actually a really good driver, when Facebook is down.
We live in the era of smartphones & stupid people
!that embarrasing moment when you fake a call then a real one comes...!lol.
Hello is this HP? I’d like to make a return. I ordered a Laser Jet and you sent me a printer.
I hate it when people are holding a device capable of using google and they ask me stupid questions.
My co workers put cookies on my desk, like they`re leaving a sacrifice for an angry god.
I’m not the friend you put on speaker phone.
Tequila... It`s not just for breakfast anymore...
Good things come to those who wait. Better things come if you stop f*cking around and make sh!t happen.
If you canΒ΄t read this, youΒ΄re illiterate.
I’m not surprised you’re having problems I had a bad experience with your reality once too.
I think that work and microwave minutes are longer than regular minutes.
If the zombie apocalypse happened in Vegas…would it β€œstay in Vegas”?
Do you have neighbors?.. Do you have extension cords?..... Are you paying too much for electricity?
No really I`m fine, I have drugs and alcohol to block out reality, but thanks anyway...