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In movies, do actors wear costume underwear? Or underwear from home? The whole thing is confusing. I don`t think I can keep watching movies
So my friend is mad at me because I slept with her ex. Her instructions were very clear when they broke up, she said "F*ck that guy!"
When I hear someone say, "chicken pot pie," I get excited three times.
The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.
There’s nothing better than when someone you know walks by without recognizing you.
Messing up a guy’s hair = cute. Messing up a girl’s hair = putting your life on the line.
Got this super hard game on my phone called Bank Of America. You only get a power up every 2 weeks? Need cheat codes
“Don’t make me regret this.” -things I think when accepting a friend request.
After the expiration date on poison, is it more potent or less potent?
The girl on the flyer is never at the club.
For the life of me, I can’t understand why small and medium pizzas exist.
My stove top knob reads, LO | 2 | 4 | 6 | 8 | 10 | HI......so what is Med-High, Medium Low?...They just need to lay it out for me in numbers! Like "set stove top to 8." no wait, 9.? Food manufacturerers and stove manufactuerers need to get toghether on this! So let me see,..... (me thinking)....if ten is high...5 is medium that means 7.5..... WAIT!.....low would be 0 so HI would be 12???....WTF!!! forget about simmer!........HEY KIDS! WHO WANTS PIZZA!
.Monday: No. Tuesday: Ugh. Wednesday: Why. Thursday: Omg. Friday: Finally. Saturday: Yes. Sunday: Crying.
I don`t like morning people ... Or mornings ... Or people.
Everyone wants their kid to learn to walk until exactly 30 seconds after their kid learns to walk.