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Let’s get naughty and save Santa the trip.
Told my kids next time I take their electronics away I`d also be responding to all texts they receive. They`ve been well behaved since.
There should be a day in between Saturday and Sunday.
Okay, I can`t take it anymore. What in the hell holds the blocks up in Mario Brothers?
I don’t care if we don’t talk, your existence still pisses me off.
I may not be a veterinarian, but I know a horses a$$ when I meet one.
If you have really strong opinions on subjects that you know very little about... then Facebook just may be the perfect thing for you.
It turns out that playing strip solitaire isn`t nearly as much fun as playing strip poker. Especially at work...
Sadly, the days of people using proper English are went.
Who needs Halloween decorations when I can just put up my selfies?
The key to a successful relationship: Tools > Internet Options > Clear history.
Life is all about tough decisions such as… Getting enough sleep or staying on the internet.
Half of my life has been spent hoping people don’t see me.
If it`s alcoholic anonymous. Why do the members stand up an in-troduce them selves?
Note to Self: These Note to Selves don’t work.