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Today would be a great day to leave a note on a random car that says "I know what you did".
Handle every stressful situation like a Dog.....Pee on it and walk away.
I`m not ignoring you, I am simply giving you time to reflect on what an idiot you are being.
So it`s racist to call a team Redskins but it`s okay to call a restaurant Cracker Barrel ?
According to a recent survey, 98% of people responded with "Go away."
If you have alphabet fridge magnets and morals, you probably shouldn`t invite me over.
I can read Spanish, Chinese, Russian and Italian. As long as it`s written in english.
I`m available if anyone needs me to ruin a good thing before it even starts.
Worried that you may have a stalker? Shut up and just be happy someone likes you.
Doing some laundry and hot single socks in my dryer are looking for a mate.
I`ve seen people tear a phone book in half with their bare hands & I just had to use scissors to open a bagged salad.
Why are police men so strong? Because they hold up traffic.
Key to a Happy Life: Get a job where people ask, “You actually get paid for doing this?”
Hubby wanted to start the new year out with a bang - So I shot him..
Just because I know I`m a "Good looking, extremely intelligent, funny as hell, sexy ass, Motherf#ker" doesn`t mean I`m "Conceited"...Im more like a "Realist", that just so happens to be very good with adjectives!...A "Bad-Ass Realist", that is!