Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
*Financial Status* Just rinsed off a paper plate...
Why is it that the more annoying the tune, the harder it is to get it out of your head?
Sometimes all you need, is 500 million dollars.
The ski racks on my car say I’m fun, adventurous, and can’t figure out how to take the ski racks off my car.
I don’t think we can get through adulthood without a good sense of humor and a strong middle finger.
Thank you for showing me your Facebook wedding album. Now if you have time, here is a slideshow of my top 36 scores in Mario Kart
Have you ever said something and immediately thought “I didn’t know I knew that."
If a woman is talking to me about her problems, I better be the cause of them.
Holidays are a lot of fun until you realize you`ve been dating the ugly sister
Whatever doesn’t kill me makes me all like, “Whoa! That was close!”
Hey babe, go to Google Earth, zoom in on your house. See that blue cap in the bushes? Hi!
My box of animal crackers says "May contain nuts." So I`m inspecting each animal before I eat it...just in case.
I just watched my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes and thought, "Wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized I just watched my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes.
Im so lazy today, I am going to watch fast and furious in slow motion.
Every pizza is a personal pizza if you eat the entire thing.