Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If it weren`t for WebMD I would have never known what symptoms to mimic so I could get all these prescriptions from my doctor.
I worry about what my rubber ducky thinks about me when I`m naked 0.0
My mother was feeling cold so now I`m wearing a sweater.
I was addicted to the Hokey Pokey but I turned myself around.
You just don’t see enough people being taken away in straight jackets anymore.
Life is never more confusing than when three people get together to order one pizza.
This year thousands of men will die from stubbornness....NO WE WON`T!!
I ran into a dwarfs car this morning and he come up to me and said "I`m not happy!" And I said we`ll which one are you then
Every time I do laundry I throw one sock in the garbage, because I lose sh*t on my own terms.
There are two types of people...don`t worry you are not one of them.
There`s nothing more terrifying than accidentally making eye contact with a mall kiosk worker.
If you had to choose between your significant other and a million dollars, what`s the first thing you`d buy?
I believe in living every day like it`s my last day, and on my last day, I plan to take it easy.
Of course China is dominating the olympics, they probably made all of the equipment.
Why do people freak out about dolphins getting caugh in tuna nets? What about the tuna?