Daily Silly Status

I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters.. do they just give you a bra and say, "here fill this out"..?

Thank God! the women with 3 boobs was a hoax... I just couldn`t wrap my hands around it....

I’m glad you’re learning to laugh at yourself. That was kind of getting awkward for the rest of us.

I don`t get personal trainers. I`ve never been exercising and thought "man, I wish someone hot was criticizing me right now."

Someday you may lose your hair, you may lose your teeth, your money and even lose your mind. But one thing you will never lose – your good looks, coz you can never lose what you don’t have!

The problem with plants is that you have to water them… like more than once apparently.

If you don`t like me now, you won`t like me later because I just get worse.

I hate being bi-polar. It`s awesome.

I`d publish my autobiography but it`s just a bunch of liquor stained pages filled with doodles, and rants about stupid people.

I`d probably get a lot more done if it wasn`t for me.

Well the Christmas tree is out of the house, and back on the rear view mirror.

I’m not the kind of person you ever put on speaker phone.

I`m sorry I slapped you but you didn`t seem like you would ever stop talking and I panicked.

The less you know, the more you think you do.

I used to be so broke when homeless people saw me coming by they would hide their change cups.