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I might not be a great example, but I´m one hell of a good warning.
I was pretty sure that at this point in my career I would have henchmen by now!
It’s like these fools at the gym have never seen someone with roller skates on the treadmill before.
“Are you working right now? Where are you working?” Facebook is worse than my parents.
I`ll do a lot of things for money, but I draw the line at working...
I wanted to say thank you to all the people who gave me a reason to drink this Friday night.
Nothing is more discouraging that unappreciated sarcasm.
I hate it when people hate me without even giving me a chance to give them a good reason to.
Apparently you can not demand to be strip searched.
May you have a prosperous New Year. I may need to borrow money.
Most of the lies I tell aren`t even true.
I`m not saying I`m out of shape but I just stretched, got winded, and need to lie down
Of all the possible utensils that could have been invented to eat rice with... How did 2 sticks win out!?
Violence is never the answer. Unless the question is `What is never the answer?`