Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Money may not buy you happiness, but it does buy you all the sh1t you want!
I told the monster in my closet that coming out of of there would make him gay, haha problem solved ....
Fun things to do in Walmart: Take the ``try me`` stickers off of the toys & place them on condom boxes.
Doctor: How`s your headache? Patient: She`s out of town.
I think the guy who invented the word kumquats should have gotten to name more stuff!
WOW! This gym thing is a lot harder than it looked on Instagram.
I`ve been waiting all winter to start complaining about the summer heat.
I don`t really want to hear about the marathon, unless of course, they add an element of suspense ... Like a Bear at mile 3
You make your own luck`.. a saying most popular with lucky f*ckers
I think my "check engine" light has finally burned out. So that`s good.
Putting a light in the refrigerator is God`s way of telling us that it`s okay to eat before going to bed.
Inspiration: nobody else knows what the hell they’re doing either.
If Reincarnation ends up being real... Those People who got "YOLO" tattoos are going to look... Pretty Silly
Great friends never let you do stupid things......alone
I was just told that I over-analyze things. I need a couple of days to think about that before deciding if I should be offended.