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...and this right here son is called pornography, and it`s why they invented the internet.
You don`t see faith healers working in hospitals, just like you don`t see psychics winning the lottery every week.
If airports are so safe, why are the buildings called Terminal
What`s the difference between "Ooooo" and "Ahhh"? About 3 inches.
My job blocked the Favstar website and I`m not sure if I should quit or take hostages. Haha! Jk. I`m totally taking hostages.
Just once...one time; can`t we buy a tree that doesn`t try to attack me when I come home drunk at 2am.
Nothing screams DUI like wearing a really nice suit on a city bus.
I have never been guilty of taking the smaller pizza slice.
Whenever I`m sad, you`re there. Whenever I`m having problems, you`re always there. Whenever my life seems out of control, you`re always there. Lets face it. You`re bad luck.
High fiving was the original "like".
Is snaxting a thing? Texting each other pics of your snacks? Cause I feel like Iād be pretty good at that.
I`m sorry, all I hear is your perfume
If you like to make love while listening to music, always choose a live album. ..That way you`ll get an applause every 3 to 4 minutes. :)
Roses are red, violets are blue, the boss snuck out early, so I left too.
What idiot called it the toaster and not the tanning bread?