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Halloween Drinking Game: Drink every-time an Elsa (from Frozen) visits your house.
Cauliflower is just broccoli ghosts.
Reality is only an illusion that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.
I’d go to the gym but I’m still tinkering with the ultimate workout playlist I started three years ago.
There is no angry way to say `bubbles.`
A high-pressure hose will usually stop a coworker from showing you any more baby photos.
Do you have to water a Pointsettia or do they die on their own?
No one thinks the screenshot of your text messages are as funny as you do. No one.
facebooked yo mama!!!
I`m so out of shape, Internet Explorer could probably run faster than me.
Nothing is truly lost until your mom can`t find it.
No matter how many gross facts you tell me about McDonald’s I’m still gonna eat it.
These ‘energy saving` light-bulbs are bullsh!t. They take just as much effort to screw in as the ordinary ones.
When someone tells you they`re playing a STD game... But you later realise they were talking about Spot The Difference.
"Don`t let a hot date turn into a due date."--my father`s actual sex talk with me when I was 13.