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Mazda’s marketing slogan is “We Build Mazdas.” They decided on it after rejecting others like: “Mazdas Are Cars” and “Buy Mazdas With Money”
I wonder if more children were conceived because of alcohol or more alcohol was consumed because of children.
Me: spends 12 hours comparing teams before completing NCAA bracket, loses $50. GF: Spends 5 minutes picking teams with "cute" mascot names, wins $1000.
Are the ATF and border patrols also shutdown? Asking for a Mexican friend....
I just don’t want to look back and think “I could’ve eaten that.”
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
Much like a dog, men will pretty much do anything you want if you feed them first.
Anyone else think there should be a sarcasm font?
May your life be as awesome as you pretend it is on Facebook.
Is bloodletting still in use today? Just thinking...I know a couple of people here that may be in need of some bloodletting
I wouldn’t pay for a personal trainer, but I would pay someone to just knock unhealthy food out of my hands.
Just killed a cricket at work, and, long story short, I`m now being asked to audition for Riverdance.
Being in the friend zone is like being the guy in the band who plays that little triangle.
The easiest way to distract a woman is to show her a picture of herself.
You know how sometimes as you fall asleep your whole body jolts you awake? That`s a ghost finishing sex with you.