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Didja ever get to know someone so well, that you wish you didn`t know them at all????
I bet more people would call the Gambling Addicts Helpline if they made every 5th caller a winner.
The best thing about online classes is the beer.
I bet the first person that heard a parrot talk really lost their sh!t.
I really don`t need to be loved.. I would settle for being tolerated. :)
Guys are like bears, if you lay very still they’ll paw at you a bit then give up and go look for food.
I don`t think the lady who just shushed a baby in the library knows how babies work
You know that awkward moment when you thought someone`s talking to you so you reply to them , then they look at you weird .
It’s amazing how long you can hold your farts at the beginning of a relationship.
You always remember your first Crush. Mine was Orange.
I wish Facebook wasn`t the only place I could block people from my life.
No one has ever been in an empty room.
I hate laundry, dishes, sweeping, mopping, dusting, fixing and fetching. The only logical conclusion is that I am descended from royalty.
I like to finish other people’s sentences because my version is better.
Want your favorite song to become your least favorite song? Just make it your alarm tune.