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Email: 8 character min, including 1 upper, 1 lower, 1 number, 1 special character. ATM card: 4 numbers
The other day someone told me I could make ice cubes out of leftover wine. I was confused... What is leftover wine?
I`m so sick and tired of my friends who can`t handle their alcohol. The other night they dropped me 3 times while carrying me to the car.
If I have offended you, hurt you, belittled you in any manner, then I want you to know that I was only just getting started.
My pessimism has never failed me, but I`m sure someday it will.
Relationships are like bathrooms. I`m in them a lot longer than I need to be, probably cause I`m playing on my phone the whole time.
You know that 200-foot high expansion bridge you drove over today? Just remember that it was built by the lowest bidder.
Today is national bring your flask to work day. I just made it up. Tell the others...
I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.
Afraid of not getting what you ordered when online shopping…..Ha, try online dating
When the girl working the counter says "would you like fries with that?" say.."are you calling me fat??" then burst into tears. Free meal.
that akward moment when you finish doing your thing in the toilet and you realise there is no tissue
If you really want someone to listen to you, start the conversation with "I shouldn`t be telling you this but ..."
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