Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
You cant ask "What do you mean by that?" without sounding pissed off
I have a feeling I already know which direction my "Get rich or die trying" lifestyle is headed.
Ah Friday my second favorite F Word
Looks like Waldo got on the malasian plane.. well played waldo.. well played..
I just read that Lindsay Lohan is headed for rehab. It`s like 2008 all over again. Or 2009. Or 2010. Or 2011. Or 2012
Unless life hands you water and sugar, your lemonade is gonna suck.
Shout out to weathermen telling us the barometric pressure like we know what the hell to do with that information.
I don`t like people who can`t make fun of themselves. It means more work for me.
I took my family to Sea World this weekend, but i wasnt allowed in. Apparently you cant take your fishing rod.
My husband and I are having a serious fight. Do you think I should let him know about it?
Listening to the voices in my head, I’ve concluded that they’re having more fun than me.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
The Super Bowl is over, everyone. Time to briefly learn the names of some Winter Olympians.
If pulled over, immediately ask the officer if they`ve been drinking in order to establish dominance.
If your day was that bad, why do you assume we want to know about it?