Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Spiders are the only web developers that are happy to find bugs.
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
Decaf only works if you throw it on people.
Call me an optimist, but I always viewed my cup as half full…of Vodka!!
Nothing f*cks up your Friday like realizing that it’s only Thursday.
The only 2 things that I love and enjoy about being an adult is having sex and drinking alcohol.
We need to DETACH from all this technology and live life in the moment. Sent from my iPhone
Learn a lesson from your dog. No matter what life brings you, kick some grass over that crap and move on.
This Status Update could be yours for six Easy Payments of $19.99
It’s 2015, why cant you unselect a floor in an elevator yet?
Most of my thoughts have been coming from a very dark place lately. That`s what happens when you forget to pay your electric bill
Dudes get one chest or arm tattoo and suddenly forget to wear shirts.
Missed connection: you were washing your car in a bathing suit. I rode past your house 78 times. You threw a rock at me.
The exam hall is the only place on the earth where everyone is desperate for teamwork..
What does "it" mean in the sentence "What time is it?"?