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A friend doesn`t question your motive, they just keep their mouth shut and dig.
Ladys have it easy, if they ever do start to loose an argument they can just start playing with their boobs
I found $80 in my jeans. The kid in me says "Buy Nerf guns and candy", but the adult in me says "Buy vodka, Nerf guns and candy".
The most common crossfit injury is a black eye from talking about it too much.
Anything is possible when you have no clue what you`re talking about
Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.
You say stalker. I say unpaid private investigator.
I just found handcuffs, a whip and a mask in my girlfriend’s bedroom. I can’t believe she’s a super hero.
I`m going to test my theory that tequila kills the flu... Or brain cells... Whatever, doesn`t matter... something`s gonna die tonight.
To save time, lets just assume I am never wrong ;)
... and so begins another failed hundred or so attempts at trying to write the correct year on anything I date.
I`m tired of being the better person. One day I`d like to be the bitch that they claim I am.
90% of being a dad is yelling about doors being left open while the air conditioning is running.
Don`t Follow Me, I`m Lost Too
roses are red,violets are blue,god made me beautiful, what happen to you..