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So how many women out there think men are pigs? Gimme a show of tits!
Has anyone EVER checked to see how the room or wall behind them looks before taking and posting 50 selfies?!
All I`m saying is why blame it on being lazy when you can blame it on being old?
I was drivin home tonight and was singin away and seen a tree ahead and swerved to miss it and realized it was my air freshener hangin from my rear view mirror!!!! CLOSE CALL!!!
I`m glad I`m me, I don`t think anybody else could take it.
I can`t find my happy place this morning, mind if I goto yours
Why am I not allowed to post anything on here?
I said "sad face emoji" instead of actually frowning today if you want to know how out of touch with reality I am.
Its amazing how much more tolerable thanksgiving with the family becomes after the 5th cocktail…
I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.
The world would be a better place if we all got along like the "Price is Right" audience.
I once shot a man with a paintball gun just to watch him dye.
I like to jump onto people`s backs as an unexpected piggy back. but sometimes I get carried away
YouTube is so addicting, I click on a music video and next thing you know I`m watching how to make ice cream.
Just once, I want to see a pregnancy test commercial where the female is like, "Aww, f*ck..."