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If you take Viagra with iron supplements it will cause you spin around and point North.
"You know what, we need a huge spoon to take care of this" -Guy who invented shovels
There would be fewer problems with children if they had to chop wood to keep the television set going.
There`s nothing as wonderful as waking up in the morning next to a gorgeous smiling face. So I keep a mirror next to my bed.
No one knows what women really want, but everyone agrees it still won`t be enough.
Immature >>> A word boring people use to describe fun people..
The more neighbors I spy on through my binoculars, the creepier I think all my neighbors are!
I`m sorry but sh!ts and giggles don`t sound like things I want to have happen at the same time.
I tried yoga once, but we called it Twister
You`d be surprised at how many times I`ve gone home, when i hear someone tell me "Go hard or Go home".
The key to eating healthy is to avoid any food that has a TV commercial.
I quit my job with the Dept of Corrections. That place was like a prison...
Lord please give me the strength not to go all Dexter on this mother f%#*er ... Amen
You want me to smile? How can I smile when 28% of Americans aren`t getting enough fiber?
I`m not naughty ... I`m mischievously creative