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After listening to what some people have to say, I am rethinking the importance this whole freedom of speech thing.
Phones are getting smarter and thinner. People, not so much.
Sometimes I just wish people were as easy to forget as PIN numbers.
Sometimes I feel like a loser for spending so much time on Facebook. Then I remember there are people out there who comment on pornhub videos
No, an erection is not considered personal growth.
I love sleep ... it’s like a Time Machine to Breakfast.
Lazy Rule #23 :No Shower Is Needed, If your Not Going Anywhere...
I`d take a stupid dog over a stupid person any day.
My therapist says I`m a clueless, un-observant trainwreck. Which is weird because up until this moment, I never even knew he was a therapist.
I have read so much about the dangers of drinking and smoking, that i have decided to quit reading
Unless you are selling Thin Mints, don’t ever knock on my door.
Wonders why we can`t just all get a Long....Island Iced Tea?!?
I don’t drink to forget about problems. I drink to create new problems that that make the old issues irrelevant.
If at first you don’t succeed, try doing it the way I told you to.
It`s weird how many people at my office are named "Hey."