Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
It is hard to imagine how people showed their anger before doors were invented.
Finger Prints on Super Bowl Trophy to be used in dozens of criminal investigations
A 6-month wait when filing for divorce, but only a 15-day wait when buying a gun. I think the solution for relationship problems is clear.
Like my therapist always says, "I`m not your therapist, you`re just laying on a couch in Ikea"
I`m leaving my body to science because even scientists need a good laugh now and then.
Whoever said the camera adds 10 pounds should stop eating cameras.
Don`t play dumb with me. That`s a game you can`t win.
The dollar store needs to go ahead and open up a few gas stations.
I need to find a job where I am paid solely on how awesome I am.
I got kicked out of the audience of "Cats" on Broadway for bringing a laser pointer.
The fact that this peanut butter jar states that it "Contains Peanuts" makes me extremely nervous for the human race.
If it doesn’t involve food or sleep, I’m probably not interested.
Can I apologize in advance for basically everything I will ever do???
Not to get technical, but according to chemistry, alcohol is a solution.
Sometimes I get mad about having to unload the dishwasher but then I remember a machine just washed my dishes for me.