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Best thing about being single… -no drama -no fighting -no crying -no feelings -no confusion -no worries -no PROBLEMS!
Sometimes, late at night in the market..i switch up all the color tubes in the hair dye kits.
I liked you until you started ignoring me and then I loved you. -Girls ---- Bfanch
For parents of small children, weekends are about as relaxing as showering with cats.
Comment if you think I`m normal... Like this if you think I`m crazy... Copy this if you know your crazy too! And if your me... OMG TURKEY SQUIRREL! :)
I spend more time looking in the fridge than I actually do eating.
You can run from your problems. Unless your problem is a cheetah.
If I agreed with you we´d both be wrong.
A communist joke isn`t funny unless everyone gets it.
I just encountered a spider bigger than my desire to be the man of the house.
A smart man washes his hands after he pees. A wise man doesn`t pee on his fingers.
If your dog is fat, you’re not getting enough exercise.
Chickens: The only animals you eat before they`re born AND after they`re dead.
"Iyam A. Wii Todd" <-- Bet you can say that name out loud, in a crowded place, and really fast!
I`m broker than the Tooth Fairy in a house full of Meth addicts.