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Since you were smiling when you tazed me, I`m guessing we still have a chance.
Test drove a Jaguar today. Very fast but the ride was pretty bumpy and the saddle kept falling off. I also think he tried to bite me.
Watching MTV Cribs makes me feel better about downloading music off the internet.
If Crunch Berries aren`t considered fresh fruit I don`t think this diet is going to work out.
The pharmacist asked me my birthday again today. Pretty sure she’s going to get me something.
The skeletons in your closet are suggesting that you upgrade to a double wide, walk-in.
I might wake up early and go running but I also might win the lottery the odds are about the same
The new Jungle Book movie might be confusing to today`s kids who don`t remember when we had jungles. Or books...
F is for friends who do stuff without you.
I’m at the age where all my posts start with the phrase “I’m at the age where.”
If a picture is worth a thousand words then why does everyone only buy Playboy magazines for the articles?
I really wish Wal-Mart had a 10 teeth or more line...
I saw a comedian one time who did nothing but make geography puns. talk abbottabad act.
Never piss off the person that cooks your dinner ... EVER!
Whenever you feel nobody cares or loves you. You should ask yourself...Am I TOO sexy?