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Testing.. Testing.. This is a test. If this were an actual ploy for attention.. I would`ve said "bacon" or "boobies."
The downside to posting jokes all the time is that if I posted "Help, I am in an Iranian prison" everyone would be like "haha good one"
Consumer confidence is at an all time high, and so am I.
Superman and Batman probably had a lot of "capes in the toilet water" accidents when they went to take a dump.
Stall Cleaning service, Satisfaction guaranteed or 100% or you manure back!
When does paying taxes get shut down? Asking for everyone with a job.
I’m working on my resume. Should I use the term “mad skillz” or would “mad skills” be more formal?
I can eat anything in the house unless it was specifically bought for my wife but the only way to know it`s for her is to eat it. Apparently
Facebook Poking Hours: Mon-Friday 7am-10pm Sat 12-11pm Sun Closed
Single ladies, stop saying you should just give up & get a cat , if no man wants you , don`t force an innocent cat to live with you..
It`s Saturday morning. My neighbor has mowed his lawn AND weeded his garden. I`ve spent ten minutes trying to reach the remote with my foot.
Should hallways in mental institutes be called psycho-paths?
Your pants say yoga but your a$$ says McDonalds!!
You really are the cat`s pajamas, and by that I mean you`re a stupid idea.
I`m surprised people still ask me if I want to hold their baby given the number of times I`ve dropped my phone.