Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Boobs are a lot like train sets, they were meant for kids, but dad always ends up wanting to play with them.
I have just one word for beautiful women with questionable morals, poor decision making skills and an insatiable sex drive ..."Hi"
I wish more people were fluent in silence.
This rough sex would have been a lot better if I wasn`t alone.
I`m considering buying a racehorse and naming it, "My Face". Just so I can hear everyone in the stands scream "Come on, My face!!"...
This prefessor`s nuts. He keeps saying pie is square. I know better, pies are round, cakes are square!
"She really does suck!" could be a complement in the porn industry
I could of sworn my pillow`s a hairdreeser...coz I always wake up with the craziest hairstyles!! :D
The closest I`ve come to being an athlete is using Adobe Acrobat.
I wonder if anyone has watched Storage Wars and said, "Hey, that`s my stuff!"?
They called themselves geologists because stoners was already taken.
Reckon the first person to make popcorn by accident probably ran away
Thumbnail pics. Helping ugly people look hot until you click on them since 1995.
They say milk is good for your teeth..you know what else is good for your teeth..minding your own damn buisness
I’m not single and I’m not committed… I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves…