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Smooth move.........ExLax
¦It’s time to clean the refrigerator when something closes the door from the inside.
When I come home 4 the holidays I throw $40 on the table & say "Look we`re keeping the thermostat at 75, and we`re turning on some lights."
I`m not lazy I just really enjoy doing nothing!!
You can learn a lot about a woman by watching her load a gun.
Old video games couldn`t be won. They just got harder and harder until you died. Just like real life.
It is a sad day when you go to all the trouble of getting a Frontal Lobotomy and no one notices.....................
I`ve been working with this alcohol free program for like six months and it`s really taken a toll on me ... I mean, I`m broke and as far as I`m concerned, they can buy their own alcohol.
Due To ObamaCare and the poor economy Holiday Cheer this year will be distributed in Shot Glasses...
I don’t understand decaf coffee. It’s like sex without the sex.
I`d take a stupid dog over a stupid person any day.
You`ve cat to be kitten me right meow.
Seeing how Iron Man and Batman are only really smart and super rich, I’m really disappointed with Bill Gates.
So far this is the oldest I`ve ever been.
My biggest problem is that I believe almost everything I tell myself.