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We got about 5-6 inches of snow here in the last 24 hrs, or, according to men, we got 8 inches.
It`s not everyday you find a $50 bill in your pocket, I didn`t, but like I said it`s not everyday..
Decaf only works if you throw it on people.
Some people might as well post ‘Wants Attention’ as their Facebook status.
Some girls are so desperate. Who calls 3 times, leaves a voicemail, and sends a text?? Take a hint, mom.
E-Cigs. The great taste of water vapor, the cool look of blowing a flashlight.
Sometimes I post crazy shit just to see if my friend`s list will drop a few #`s
I will never admit to my parents that I don’t believe in the Easter Bunny or Santa as long as I still get presents and candy.
feels guilty for not spending more time with my kids. I should really get them a Facebook account.
Don`t have sex man, it leads to kissing and pretty soon you will have to start talking to her..
No man has ever won a game of `notice anything different about me?`
Girl are you a University of Phoenix degree because I`m pursuing you online and from my couch
I’m not positive that having the TV volume on an odd number will destroy the world, but lets not risk it.
If i had a dollar for everytime i was thinking about you, i would start thinking about you.
I`ve often wondered: Who the heck is Pete, and why do we do things for his sake?