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All I`m saying is that the cheese grater wouldn`t have 4 sides if they wanted you to wash it after every use.
I hate when our cat runs into the room, hisses at an empty chair then runs back out and I end up in the bathtub holding a crucifix.
should probably get my daily dose of calcium.. white russians it is
Sometimes I run toward people & expect them to know that I want them to do the Dirty Dancing lift but they never know and I slam into them.
is a mystery you´ll never solve
Things that make women emotional- 1) sad movies 2) love stories 3) anything 4) everything
I don’t always have time to study, but when I do, I don’t.
Yes I walked away mid-conversation. You were boring me to death and my survival instincts kicked in
Mondays are middle finger approved
I just found out that all the people who say "You haven`t changed a bit" have been lying to me. :)
Please don`t mistake my personality for flirting. Just because I`m awesome doesn`t mean I like you.
I have to be funny because being hot is not an option.
Its so hot I used my blow dryer as a cooling fan!
This spider just got away from me because I made the classic villain mistake of telling him my whole evil plan before killing him.
The Spanish version of the Subway jingle “65.63 Peso 0.3 meter largo” isn’t quite as catchy…