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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Son to mom: why should I sweep the floor? Mom to son: do you want to be an Olympic Curl champion?
Our phone falls, we panic... our friends fall, we laugh.
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
Sometimes I order fajitas at a restaurant just to get more attention.
I am Bad and thats Good. I will never be Good and thats not Bad. There`s no one i`d rather be than ME.
Friends with benefits? What, like you can provide dental insurance?
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
I`m tired of things costing money
I named my dog "5 Miles" so I can tell people, "I walk 5 Miles every day"
I want to follow my dream, but i dont want to look like a stalker
Hopefully because of social networking, I`ve tarnished my reputation enough for anybody to ever place me in a role of great responsibility.
I am not saying you are stupid, because I thought you already knew
Somewhere, right now.. One of my Facebook friends is already drunk!
I don`t go on Facebook much so Dave, if you`re seeing this, thanks for the invite to your 2007 New Year`s party, hope you had fun dude.
Sorry I`m late, my alarm didn`t go off, because I didn`t set it ... because I don`t like coming here