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There are over 4 million workplace injuries reported every year. Play it safeβ¦call in sick tomorrow.
"Give me your finest meal, money is of no concern." ~ Me at McDonald`s on pay day.
What sort of drug abuse and debauchery has to occur in someone`s life for them to start liking Charmin Toilet Paper on Facebook?
Is there another word for synonym?
My best relationship advice: Make sure you`re the crazy one.
Sorry, I just saw your text from last night. Are you guys still at the restaurant?
The guy blaring the self help CD at the red light in the rusted car with no bumpers wasn`t amused when I said, "I don`t think it`s working"
I`m convinced that homeless people have all the shopping carts with 4 good wheels.
Went to a nudest camp once and all I could think was.. these are the people you see dressed in Wal-Mart that you don`t want to see naked.
Candy Crushers keep inboxing me saying that they need "lives" as if I didn`t already know that.
It`s damn funny when a wife think`s she`s punishing her husband by not talking to him for days..
I`m going to stand outside. So if anyone asks, I am outstanding.
Afraid my muffin top is desiring to become a pound cake.
If booze isn`t the answer, then your question sucks.
I did a terrible job preparing for my Blue Man Group audition and boy is my face red