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Pretty fed up with the fact that pandemonium almost NEVER involves pandas.
If a woman shaves her legs for you, at least every other day, in the Winter time, it`s Love.
You, my friend, deserve a high-five... that’s four more fingers than I normally give.
I`ve been told my posts are too depressing but what does it matter. We`ll all be dead soon anyway.
Who the hell invented Bull Riding? "Hey, I`m gonna hop on that 2,000 pound pissed off animal...Time me!!!"
I`m sorry I snort-laughed when you were saying your vows.
If you have ever sat in the toilet at work and wondered how long you can sit there before someone searches for you, the answer is 47 minutes
With all the technology available now, you’d think they’d have found a way to grow apples without those little stickers.
Thanks coffee for tricking us into believing that it`s a good morning for a few minutes.
We are living in a generation where Vampires are sparkly,Werevolves are gay and Witches wear leather pants.
If I’ve learned anything from these ghost hunter shows, it’s that everyone speaks English after they die.
Who ever snuck the s in "fast food" was a clever little bastard!
3 bottles of bleach: $15.00. One rope, 3 rolls of duct tape, and a shovel: $35.00. 3 boxes of trash bags: $10.00. The look on the cashier`s face: Priceless!:D
Monday?! But, I wasnt even finished with Saturday yet.
I think Facebook now comes under the housework category.