Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I tried being awesome today, but I was just so tired from being awesome yesterday.
It`s unfortunate that most people will never run out of things to say.
Some of the best decisions I`ve ever made involved me clicking cancel instead of send
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
My girlfriend told me I`m starting to annoy her because I relate everything to batman... What a joker!
Remember, you can always run from your problems. Unless your problem is a Cheetah.....then you`re screwed!
You can call someone who makes prosthetics a professional body builder
People are like slinkeys; they don’t really serve a purpose, but you can’t help but laugh when one of them falls down the stairs.
Here`s a list of things I need you to accomplish without any resources to do them with. -management
I need to find new reward systems besides beer and chocolate.
How does anything ever get done at the bubble wrap factory?
Hey Monday+?+(???) +?+
Pumpkin for sale! [slightly used]
Pizza: Round food, cut into triangles and put into a square box.
I`m not naughty ... I`m mischievously creative