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Organized people are just too lazy to look for things!
wondering if today is a good day to implement my plan...
Wanted: Someone to hand feed me Cheetos so my fingers don`t get orange..... P.S. No weirdos.
I don`t always agree with everything I say. :)
Hummingbirds are just regular birds that can`t remember the lyrics.
I can already tell it`s going to be another one of those mornings where I`m not rich and famous.
It`s 2014, people. Isn`t it about time we put an end to all this `wake up in the morning and go to work` nonsense?
I drink because people talk.
If you don’t want to marry me, why did you sit next to me on this bus?
I try to find the good in every situation. I meant “food.” I try to find the food in every situation.
They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what! Who wants to be in a hurry?!?
You can tell a man`s age by how close their socks are to their knees.
My New Year’s resolution is to save enough to buy a Velcro wall ... I plan on sticking to it.
If a zombie apocalypse were to happen in Vegas... would it stay in Vegas?
Hell hath no fury like a girl tagged in an unapproved pic on Facebook.