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All guys should learn from Mario Bros. No matter how far their princess is, they should go after her.
Sorry I pissed you off, but I find you much more entertaining this way.
FINALLY home from work! So, yea...if your phone number is on your profile...I will be drunk dialing you in about 30 minutes or so.
I don`t know how many girls it takes to change a light bulb, but I guarantee we`d post pictures of us doing it on Facebook.
you know why maths is unhappy? because it got so many problems.
I`d say 20% of my day is spent trying to convince the dog we`re not about to be murdered by the UPS guy, mailman, squirrels, or the ice dispenser..
ah... Crocs the 21st century version of the chastity belt
Not all country music is terrible. If you can get past the lyrics about trucks, mud, farms and cows... It`s actually not too bad.
No one`s going to do it for you. It`s up to you, to make naps a priority in your life.
You`re the one who wore a red and yellow scarf to class. So don`t look at me weird for shouting "10 points for gryffindor" when you answer questions cause I know you wanted this. -Bfanch
I always carry a jellyfish in case I need to pee on someone.
The heart wants what the heart wants. *opens 12th beer*
The cop at your front door is never a stripper when you want them to be.
People who sit and talk while their pizza is gets cold gives me anxiety.
Saw a wasp in a spider web and I don`t know who to root for.