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Rubix cubes are EASY....when you`re color blind.
To me, suicide seems selfish. For all I know, someone else might want to kill me
For the record when I was a kid I never wanted to be an adult.
woman belong in the kitchen? thats where the knives are you fool.
Why would anybody put 99 bottles of beer up on a wall in the first place?
Nothing says God is forgiving like hell.
Sometimes I wish I could officially change "Hump Day" into "Smack-A-Dumb-Bitch-In-The-Face" Day.
Hey people who buy bottled water for their dogs, can I have some money?
Under no circumstances shall a call be made to another male after 2 a.m., unless its to get bailed out of jail.
I will give you unconditional love as soon as you meet my list of demands.
My love is like a candle, If you forget about me, I`ll burn your frikin house down!
Respect your parents, they pay for your internet.
I`ve been told I`m doing exceedingly well in my exaggeration therapy class, I think it`s because I`ve been giving it 180 percent.
Judging by the way some women wear makeup it`s rather obvious they didn`t excel at coloring as a kid ...
I think girls secretly enjoy putting guys in the friend zone