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To be truthful,,, I have never unrolled a sleeping bag and been able to roll it back up any smaller than the size of a garage.
I put the o in illiterate!
My dad said if I don`t get of facebook in 3 seconds he would jab my face into the keyboahajsirksjapquebxm
You don`t look like 200 likes in person
Every pizza is a personal pizza, if you try hard and believe in yourself.
All I`m saying is that if you were a real psychic palm reader you would of made me wash my hands first.
Comment if you think I`m normal... Like this if you think I`m crazy... Copy this if you know your crazy too! And if your me... OMG TURKEY SQUIRREL! :)
wassup pips! :-) no i don`t mean you guys pip, get it? piping?? haaahaaa... looks like i`m the only one laughing right? well it sounded funnier in my head (-_-)
I don`t understand interventions. What`s the point of being told I drink too much by a room full of reasons why I drink in the first place?
Just convinced my Mom she won`t get Wolf of Wall Street if she doesn`t see Teen Wolf first.
The hardest part about going through a divorce is finding a hitman you can trust.
What if Oxygen makes our voice really deep…. And Helium just brings it back to normal?
I don’t have nightmares... I create them for others ;-)
It`s not too late to start convincing our children that the world really did end in 2012 and we`re the survivors.
The reason why women will never be the ones to propose is because as soon as she gets on her knees, he will start unzipping his pants