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That urge you get to write, "No one cares" on someone`s status.
that awkward moment when you`re scuba diving and you see Adele rolling in the deep.
Girls love shoes… so if she throws one at you, you know she’s really pissed off.
The statement ‘Hey! Calm down!’ has a zero to no success rate of getting someone to calm down.
Things to do today.....pet all the spiders in my house at least twice with my shoe.
Girls here`s how to tell if a guy wants you for sex - 1: He does
My husband ran for 30 minutes on the treadmill. He`s told every other person on earth and I didn`t want y`all to be out of the loop.
If you really loved your kids, you would teach them to say their alphabet forwards AND backwards. They`ll thank you later.
My neighbours diary say`s I have boundary issues.
Somebody tell me how "Rub a dub dub, 3 men in a tub" became a nursery rhyme?
Why would you be scared to get Ebola? You haven`t left your couch since 2011.
Writing is a great career when people like hearing what you have to say but don`t want to look at you.
Kinda makes you wonder how many employees used to piss on their hands in the bathroom before management finally took action
That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is "act natural, you`re innocent".
Studies show that men who have sex more often tend to have a longer life expectancy. Unless your wife finds out.