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Why can`t braille just be in the shape of the letters?
Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you`ll get if you`re able to "fall asleep right now."
"10 Totally Epic Reasons Why You`re Going Straight to Hell" - 2013 version of Ten Commandments
I got pulled over for drunk driving last night. In my defense I didn`t even know I was driving.
It takes two people to lie....one to lie.....the other to listen
You know the road is in bad shape when you drive to the grocery store and your fitbit registers 1,000 steps.
Wisdom for the day is , hot cheetos are not breakfast.
"I`ve never seen an angry stoner, see angry drunks all the time!" Clearly you`ve never tried to take a stoner`s nachos away.
The best thing about hand sanitiser is that when you put it on, it looks like you are plotting to take over the world.
There I was, watching a advertisement when a YouTube video rudely interrupts it...
Whenever you`re feeling down and in the dumps, just remember...the rest of us have been feeling that way about you too!
Iām amazed by how quickly I forget what Iām doing.
My best friend sent me a message saying,"Your stupid," I replied,"atleast I know the difference between you`re and your,"
The only thought I have for the weather lately is that someone somewhere is losing a game of Jumanji.
For a one-way mission to Mars, we should send a blogger. Not so they can blog about the experience, but so there`d be one less blogger.