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I may not be the best looking, wittiest, smartest or even the most successful person. I forget where I was going with this...
Wait...so the "c-word" isn`t co-worker?
Top uses for Golf Balls: 1. Describing hail storms 2. Describing tumors 3. Playing golf
I’m having some vision trouble today. I can’t see myself doing anything.
I made a chicken salad today... The little bastard didn`t even eat it.
Falling in love is just like falling down a well, except one is dank, dark and scary, and can really hurt you, and the other is a well.
Hold boobs not grudges.
about love
The zoo is a pretty safe place to fart.
Bran flakes. Helping pants fit better for over 100 years.
The heart wants what the heart wants. *opens 12th beer*
I kinda like zombies...but can we go ahead & decide whether they can run fast or just walk? ... my apocolypse plans depend on it ... thanks!
A company has announced a new service where you carpool with strangers. It`s a new cutting-edge technology called "taking the bus."
Mail from Grandma: FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:No subject
When ever I think about the past...It brings back so many memories