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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Why can`t braille just be in the shape of the letters?
It is hard to imagine how people showed their anger before doors were invented.
Vegetarians live up to nine years longer. Nine horrible, tedious, meaningless, worthless, baconless, cheeseburgerless, meatless years.
good boys go to heaven bad boys go every where
I don`t really work, I just kinda stand around and be awesome.
Passed a vampire, a zombie, and a prostitute on the way to work tonight. Not sure which ones were in costume…
i like cake. and thats all for today goodbye :)
What idiot decided it should be my foot`s asleep instead of coma toes?
Friends don’t let friends twerk.
You`re about as deep as a kiddies splash-pool..
Missing my childhood super-powers, when I could sleep on the couch and wake up in bed.
I just wish the automatic paper towel dispensers were half as sensitive as the automatic flushers.
Happy Birthday to all those ladies that their men forgot about because it falls on Super Bowl Sunday this year.
Having the worst day ever. All traffic lights I passed were green so I had to stop on the side of the road to check my Facebook like some caveman.
Porn can be so misleading. I quit my pizza delivery job after two days.