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More food should come with prizes inside it.
Sometimes I feel bad about the things I say and do, but today is not one of those days.
Tomorrow I will live in the moment, unless it`s unpleasant, in which case I will eat a cookie.
Women are fascinated by mythical creatures like unicorns, vampires, and men who are good listeners.
Just found out that Iām 53 Cheetos tall.
I`m lost, no wait..... Yep, lost for sure
I can`t be trusted with your alphabet magnets.
If Eve sacraficed the whole human race for Apple, I wonder what she would have done for a Klondike Bar?
The word bed looks like a bed.
I`m trying to locate a girl from high school. You know, the one who could tie a cherry stem with her tongue.
Life`s too short for Salad..............
A word to the wise isn`t necessary - it`s the stupid ones that need the advice.
Been coughing all night & day, can`t seem to stop. Guess I should go see a movie.
Is it rude to put *vomits* under someone`s post ?
Some people walk into your life and leave footprints on your heart. Some people walk into life and make you want to leave footprints on their face