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Change of plans everyone: NOBODY Wang Chung tonight.
I have found that the best work from home occupation is a bartender
Just checked my Farmville for the first time in 2 years... It`s now a Walmart.
I`m living in a drama-free bubble today. Respect the bubble people, respect it!
If something on this page offends you, please bring it to our attention so we can all laugh at you.
Next time I get a bunch of, "likes," on a comment I post on someones status/photo etc.. Im gonna edit my comment and change the whole comment to, "like this status if you would f*ck your father." Just to make anyone else who reads it from then on think ill about the people who liked it. ™
I`m not sure who looks more frightened & confused when someone knocks on my door, the dog or me?
Not that I expect 100% truth in advertising, but shouldn’t those women in the tampon commercials be wielding chainsaws and burning stuff down, not laughing and dancing?
I’ve finally decided to do something about my weight ... Lie.
I hate it when I fill my blowup doll with helium and then she plays hard to get...
After watching the "Schticky" ad, I am convinced now there are 8 wonders of the world.
My New Year`s resolution is to help all my friends gain ten pounds so I look skinnier.
I like people the most when I`m by myself.
I keep my land line so I can find my cell phone.
I`m at the point in my life where "friend with benefits" just means a person who gives me their Bed Bath & Beyond coupons.