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Don`t talk to me about disappointment. I had lots of adults tell me they were gonna "fix my little red wagon" yet here it sits with a broken wheel still
If I truly posted what was on my mind ... I´d most likely be in a psychiatric hospital right now.
I consider anything that doesn`t fit in the dishwasher to be for one time use.
You’d think with as much time women spend looking at their ass in the mirror, they would be able to reverse into a parking spot.
Sometimes I like to hold the door for people who are far away so they feel obligated to run just a little. ;)
I could of sworn my pillow`s a hairdreeser...coz I always wake up with the craziest hairstyles!! :D
I’ve been searching for my stolen bed. And I won’t rest until I find it.
I`m no expert, but I`m pretty sure a lot of economic problems could be solved by extending the McDonald`s breakfast menu back out to 11am.
next time you`re at a movie point at the screen when a scene with extras are on and say to your buddy "look, there i am!" and see how many people look over at you in awe.
Another funny thing about this status is when you finally realize that it talks about nothing? its all ready too late to stop reading. lol
If I`m in a public bathroom and someone else in that same bathroom is on the phone and states that they are ANYWHERE ELSE, I flush my toilet
I got kicked out of the audience of "Cats" on Broadway for bringing a laser pointer.
If you don’t like my sense of humor please tell me… so I can laugh at you!
Safety Tip: lock your doors and windows before bed. Btw, I love what you`ve done with the place.
If nobody comes from the future to stop you, how bad can the decision really be?