Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
There would be fewer problems with children if they had to chop wood to keep the television set going.
Seems like my body should have better things to do than make nipple hair.
I don`t have the blood alcohol level to deal with you
It`s really quite simple ... I do what I want! ... The End.
It`s funny to watch all these people Bumping Up their own posts.
Remember if you ask me to put sun lotion on your back, I am definitely drawing something dirty while I`m back there.
The guy below me obviously has never seen R2-D2.
I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.
Hope you don`t mind if I make transformer sound effects when we switch positions.
So, is Dora 18 yet, or what? Asking for a friend.
Judging from the bar receipts, ATM withdraws, hand stamps, and the glitter in my car, I now realize I`m a ball of fun when I black out.
Screaming out "BOOM PREGNANT!" during sex is never as funny as you think it will be.
According to my current parking spot, I`m Chief of Police.
Nothing makes me more nervous than getting FB msg saying, “You’ve been tagged in a photo” after a crazy weekend.
So there`s a t.v. show called, It`s Me or the Dog?.. I was disappointed to find out its not a game show where people guess who farted