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Not sure if this Adderall is working but I just made a pros and cons list about pros and cons lists.
I don’t like people who can’t make fun of themselves. It just makes more work for me.
On my bucket list: To be chased through a kitchen at a Chinese restaurant like in the movies.
Based on how I react when the toast pops out of the toaster, I will never look cool walking away from an explosion.
Just been wondering what "please Do Not Touch" would be in Braille
I gave up my Ego, because I am so much better than that..................
Even if I were taking a dump on the moon someone would walk in and sit down in the stall next to me.
These animal crackers are crap, this elephant tastes exactly like that giraffe did.
If you think someone is staring at you: 1. Yawn 2. If they yawn, they were staring.
Don`t play dumb with me. That`s a game you can`t win.
I can almost always tell if a movie doesn`t use Real dinosaurs.
The number of things that are *NOT* rocket science is staggering.
No, PornHub, I would NOT like to share this video with my friends and family on facebook.
Billion dollar idea: Make a prescription drug that gets rid of the side effects of all the other prescription drugs.
What idiot called it the "Happy Birthday" song instead of New Age music