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"Why haven`t you been answering my pigeons?" -- Girlfriends in the 17th century probably
If you are having anxiety over something you`ve said or done, just remember that 90% of the world only cares what you look like.
People tend to get angry when you treat them the same way they treat you.
I try not to be rude, but some people make it hard work.
Just checked my Farmville for the first time in 2 years... It`s now a Walmart.
If we aren`t supposed to be too close to the microwave then why do they show us food twirling around in there?
Oh, you think you have relationship problems? Try separating me from my bed in the morning...
I`m going to start looking for the good in all people I meet this year. Except for the a$$holes.
Anyone who wastes my time is a clocksucker.
If anybody out there happens to have my voodoo doll, can u please scratch my balls. I happe to be in a public place at the moment.
Why did the Fresh Prince have to take a cab anyways? How sh!tty was that family that no one would pick him up from the airport?
I can eat a piece of pie without a plate or a fork what else should I write on this dating site profile?
I tried counting sheep to get to sleep, but one was missing and now Iām gonna be up all night worrying.
A real friend is someone who knows how damn crazy you are... But is still willing to be seen out in public with you.
Did a 5k today. Except it was how many calories I had at lunch.