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It’s called “Karma” and it’s pronounced [hah hah fuhk yoo]!!
I have to wonder why we have "non-essential" government employees in the first place.
Tonight I plan on drinking until I`m someone else`s problem
Please don`t hastag out loud...
I love to start my day by getting on Facebook to see who is a whiny little bi!ch today.
I want to grow my own food but no one makes pizza seeds.
You know you`re getting old when bending over is a one-way trip.
Babysitting is a way for teenagers to feel like adults while adults go out to feel like teenagers.
Of course I can keep a secret. It’s the people I tell it to who can’t.
Somebody needs to teach opportunity how to use a doorbell.
is running out of excuses for the stupid things I do. Please submit suggestions below.
Good neighbors do not put password on their wi-fi.
Between the coffee and the cocaine, it looks like the mission of Colombia is to wake up the world.
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
Just tried to put my seatbelt on ... at my desk ... I`m pretty.