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There should be a day in between Saturday and Sunday.
"Nineteen letters long" is 19 letters long.
Today`s society is a good example of what happens when you let the clowns run the circus.
If all men are created equal then why are there midgets?
Wind chimes? I can`t see myself saying, its too quiet, you know what`d be nice? Noise.
Help keep America beautiful. Stay in your house today.
I have hit the age where sex and choosing the exact right size Tupperware for leftovers are equally satisfying...
I slept and woke up. (ok, lately this has become a major accomplishment in my life)
Pringles should make their containers like a Push Up Pop.
Vaginas are like the weather. When it`s wet, it`s time to go inside.
People will believe anything if you whisper it.
Can`t they just make a "Poke infinity" button?
I`m the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me, just remember: I KNOW HOW TO HIDE A DEAD BODY
Is it too early to start drinking? - some moron with a clock.
OK so i have an idea ............... wait why are you all running away?