Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sometimes, you can just tell it`s gonna be a "does not play well with others" kind of day.
You know you are old when your parties have glasses instead of red plastic cups.
If I told you I loved you, would you believe me or just stand there freaking out about me being in your closet?
I’m just like everyone else: I put my straight jacket on one buckle at a time.
I just realized that the only time I`m good at dancing is when I`m about to pee my pants
The amount of alcohol I would need to sleep with you would actually kill me.
Ways to tell a woman is mad at you: 1. She is silent. 2. She is yelling. 3. She acts different. 4. She acts the same. 5. She kills you.
Without facebook: more sleep, less drama, and a life!
I have no idea what a bejeezus is,,, but apparently mine scares easy.
Would people still go to the gym if Instagram didn`t exist?
Do feminists look under their beds for the boogie woman?
According to WebMD, MedicineNet, Healthline, Mayo Clinic, Symptom Checker, NetDoctor, MedlinePlus, Johns Hopkins and InfoMedNet, I`m OCD.
Wow....turns out I`m NOT a Ninja. That really hurt.
I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell. :)
If ghosts existed, why are they all apparently from the last 100 years or so? Wouldn’t there be evidence of a Neanderthal ghost here and there?